REALITY CHECK #22 - HELP! MY TEEN IMPREGNATED ANOTHER!

Before it looks like I’m speculating about the obvious, there are some things that just eat me up when I see them.

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I wanted to buy pap at a local’s house one of these days, and the pap seller’s daughter who packaged what I’d be buying seemed to be at least six months gone and she was obviously a teenager, it also seemed like she had stopped school telling by the time of the day and the period it was in the school calender. I couldn’t help but imagine the event that could have followed after she was found out. The heart break, interrogation, anathematization if any at all, and resolution. I wasn’t bothered that they seemed to be at peace with her condition now, at least one’s child can’t be so troublesome to the extent of offering the child to lions for lunch. But I was bothered if they saw any of the problems that caused her getting pregnant and wanted to do something about it or let it pass.

Just like we have seen or heard about classmates of our elder ones that got pregnant and left school, friends of friends that got an abortion, our own classmates that got pregnant too, there’s one I’m not sure if she had an abortion or had the baby. And we have been shocked by the realities, gossiped about them and felt untouchable by such circumstances.

The first time I was inspired to take a stand concerning teenage pregnancy was just about this time eight years ago. And finally taking vivid steps towards it now, I got talking with someone and he asked if the people that this societal ill affected the most saw it as a problem? I had thought about that before then I had to think about it again and to be sure,

I need objective views. You may have seen instances of complacency, disdain or pain with respect to the subject, or it may have affected you one way or the other.

So let’s do some role playing here. What would you do as a parent if your teen got pregnant or impregnated another?

Do the people most affected (i.e pregnant teenagers, the impregnator, friends and family of the former) by teenage pregnancy think it is a problem? Or am I in another world seeing problems where there are none?

REALITY CHECK #21 - SPOTTING OR SOLVING PROBS, WHERE DO YOU FALL?

I think it's high time we take a stand for change and not just cheap talk. John C Maxwell said there is a difference between problem spotting and problem solving. The average Nigerian can spot problems and argue inexhaustibly about it. Let's ask how far that has got us, ehn? 

Let's be problem solvers in every little way we get the chance to and don't get the chance to be. Let's think, talk and think. Let's spot the problems, think and work to solving them. The status quo has got to end, aren't you tired?

Me I am o and I want to Take A Stand, Make A Difference. You nko?

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Live. Learn. Love

5 Tips On Being An Exceptional...

We are irredeemably social as humans and love to interact, so we build relationships. There's a Yoruba saying that goes, 'Humans are like water courses' so we part to meet and meet to part.

Have you ever found yourself having difficulty someplace you are not too familiar with, and then someone you knew or knew you somewhere else comes into the picture to save the day? That's the value of the littlest forms of relationships built.

The reasons you should build relationships is not because you want favors or to make money from them, but because you can build a dependable bond, learn humility, and add value. So how do you do this?

Be friendly to people you see everyday, greet them, you may be lightning someone up for the rest of the day with just a smile. It's a good way to increase your circle of friends, and make peace.

Integrity, try to be sure of what you say to be true and stand by it. People don't like to deal with others whose words and will waiver. Be decisive and assertive.

Pay Attention, be observant of people's needs, they are opportunities for you to offer value. This way you teach yourself to be desired by others. People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Be down to earth, even fake people don't like to have fake people around them. Don't be in the clouds of eloquence and brilliance all the time, bring it home, speak pidgin if you can't speak their local language. Abeg! No forming. Let others find it easy to relate with you and your experiences no matter what side of the  divide you're on. Let them think you exceptional, not strange.

Last but not the least...

Be receptive: Make others feel wanted and relevant by receiving from them. Ask questions, for directions, how to do things and receive gifts (according to your discretion). People around you feel good to know they can add value to you also.

PS: I'm on this journey too.

LIVE,LEARN,LOVE!

Mjady

SOS : Six and Molested.

There are a lot of incidences that occur to people everyday that indicate that the world is ailing and would still be, but it doesn't mean that nothing should be done about the world's ailments.

*Funsho who is not able to cater for the education of all his children turns to his siblings for help, and his idea of help is scattering his children across his siblings' families so as to get them educated. *Queen moved to stay with her aunt when she was Four years old so she could get educated, but she has been handling responsibilities far from her age's capability. Now she returns from school everyday to wait for hours outside the house, hungry and unattended to, till her aunt returns from her shop with her cousins who attend a different school and are dropped to be with their mum till they retire to their home. *Queen is now Six years old and not just waiting after school unattended to, a neighbor has sighted her in the mallam's shop being molested by the pervert. *Queen denied it when she was asked what happened.

I've not been so settled after hearing this story, these happenings are the foundations of the promiscuous girls of tomorrow. I wondered if there was a rescue operation body out there that can save Queen from the neglect and abuse she's experiencing everyday..

You can say this is not my business, but I'm on her case would still be on her case till there's a way out for Queen.

How many more bent trees do we have wait to get from twisted saplings?

Actions Speak Louder Than Intentions.

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We were preparing Sunday lunch, and I'm still trying to recall how the discussion started. 

Ok! Triple A stepped into the kitchen wanting something to snack on before lunch was ready, he asked if the cereal was for our nephew who was around with his mum.

Mobbie said it was for everyone.

Triple A thought out loud that it was adult food that the baby would still grow to eat.

Mjady said if it was for our nephew, it won't be bad for him to eat it, that he would just be eating ounje omo (I don't know how to translate that to English in two words)

Triple A replied that it was okay for a child to eat the food for adults but not the other way round, and the same thing with clothes.

Mobbie and Mjady argued with Triple A playfully, that it's just ounje omo, as a parent you would j'ounje omo, especially as a mother, what if the baby doesn't finish the food? You wouldn't throw it away now, and there's no big deal in it afterall.

Triple A retorted that we were wombiliki, wobia. Then he opened the door of the refrigerator, picked up the half drunk up Caprisonne he saw and sipped, then asked to whom it belonged.

Mobbie replied that he was taking ounje omo , we laughed at him.

Then he said "You see that's how life is o, people don't see your intentions, they only see your actions."

WERD!! (Pun intended)

When you stand for something and you've bragged about your standing, you may fall into traps that make your actions contradict your intentions.

Let he who stands take heed...