I remember that particular vacation day from the term that I clocked Thirteen years in secondary school, settling down in the back seat of the car beside mummy as we travelled home. I really can't remember what she was busy doing, but I tried starting a conversation.
"So mummy, i'm thirteen now, you can tell me all those things you think I should know now."
She almost didn't look at me " What do you mean?"
I giggled, she was being coy "What do you mean?" Her face almost expressionless
"I'm serious mummy, we can now have mother and daughter heart to heart talk on what a girl my age should know naw?"
She didn't say anything
"Mummy naw," I persisted
Then she said that gibberish that meant I should leave her alone ( I don't know what language I could write it, or if it starts with a consonant or vowel) but in plain english it should be the equivalent for the short word 'shoo'.
And I did since then, I shut up. I wanted a fresh opportunity for both of us to start bonding, not like I didn't know what girls my age should be taught so as to stay on the right path, my mind had always been more advanced than my age like most of us born in the computer age.
It's like ten years down the lane now, any opportunity she finds in a conversation, or if she realizes one of my friends I may have just mentioned in a conversation is male, she'd start questions and talking about things that I wanted us to talk about ten years ago. I don't reply her with that gibberish that I can't spell or say the english equivalent, but sometimes I remind her of that encounter and she says she doesn't remember. Most times I get satisfied by not satisfying her curiosity.
What's my point here? Most times parents tend to ignore the emotional needs of their children, because they feel they are faced with more important life issues as parents. Then when some kids do find their answers in the wrong places, and events that point out that the child's innocence has been broken to their parents' oblivion occurs, parents then realize that kids grow up really fast. And one day, they may wake up to find an empty nest and that their offsprings are really gone.
I'm not here to spite my mother, (Hmmn! I love her to pieces) but to remind all parents, tell all intending parents and present children that we all need a strong parent-child bond to learn, live and love. We need it to stand on shoulders, also to learn from experience and example alike.
So now, I try to open up to my mother, hoping that she can put a little trust in what I've grown up to become and not see me as ten years younger than my age. Because I know it is TRUE that no matter the new clothes a child has amassed, he can never have as much used clothes as an elderly person. That's a Yoruba proverb I just interpreted.
Can I have your thotstoshare on this?
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